This weekend I got smacked straight in the forehead with some level eight (or however high tsunamis are rated) homesickness. I'm the unsuspecting city about to get pummeled with a whole ocean's worth of feelings, thoughts and people of home. I feel blindsided. Not that I expected a sick-free two years out here, but dang, I didn't expect to get hit so hard and so fast.
It started on Saturday when I knew my parents were flying to Arizona for the next few months to be with my sister, her fiance, the holidays, and to help with wedding plans. Knowing that they were all going to be together without me put a sour taste in my mouth. Now, my sister and I have been living away from my parents for the last five years, but I've always had her and my parents always came out for the holidays. This year is going to be completely different. Fingers crossed for fun Thanksgiving plans! Christmas/birthday plans, check!
It's creeping up on three months of living and working abroad and all of my relationships at home are being tested. Most are passing with flying colors, but a few are fading away into nothing. Those that are fading away of your own choice, you make me sad and have hurt me, but there is nothing I can do to change who you are and how you react to challenges. I wish things were different, but it's time for me to focus on those who make an effort to be in my life and show me that they love and care for me in all sorts of different ways, despite the time difference, schedules and life in general.
So, to my friends and family who sensed the storm from the air and dropped me a parachute, I love you to the moon, and I'm so grateful to have you in my life corner! Xoxo
